At first it was fun as I gained attention at my cousin’s wedding, sneaking drinks when no one was watching. I got the same attention that I did when I did my little magic tricks. I was 12 years old and got drunk. I can’t remember the rest of the night. The next day I was violently ill and missed a week of school. Never again… I’ll stick with my magic.
A few months later at my brother’s wedding it happened again. This was the beginning of an alcohol and drug diseased life of pain and disappointment. After 30 years of jails, overdoses, losing friends and family, I was at my last hope of saving my own family, job, and self.
I gave up drinking and drugging with 12 step help and a brief detox program. After 89 days I thought I deserved a treat. The first airplane size bottle I drank did no harm, so I headed back for another one. I know now it was God showing me I cannot have one drink!
I woke up in a hospital handcuffed to the bed. My wife and baby boy were there and the police read me my rights. I was in an accident with four vehicles and under arrest for possession of cocaine, heroin, and open empty quarts of liquor, and several phony identifications. There was a stolen mountain bike in the trunk that I also had no memory of stealing. Never again! I must stop! And I did until I got out of the hospital.
I started again and ended up losing everything dear to me, family, homes, cars, jobs, and my self worth. I found myself homeless, unemployable, faithless and basically staying alive only to feed my addiction. I lived in abandon houses, buildings, a guard shack, and mostly under a bridge by the Trenton train station. This was the last three years of my disease. Finally, a prayer for help changed my life. A Power greater than me got me to Freedom House.
Freedom House taught me to be human again. That I am somebody! That I have a family in recovery. In 9 months I grew up more than in my whole previous life. My life was saved at Freedom House. I thank the graduates that came back to show us the way. Now I am able to reach out and pass the good news that there IS a way out. There are hundreds of men, woman, and children that would not be here if God hadn’t put Freedom House on the hill to show us the way out.
I am a miracle and blessed to be drug and alcohol free since September 24th 1999. That’s 14 “Grace of God” years. Thank You!
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